tears tears tears

healing is the way, and it is exhausting. processing 47 years of dysregulation is tiring. it feels lighter, and i wouldn’t NOT do it but it is hard as hell.


Santosha (skt. संतोष saṃtoṣa) literally means “contentment, satisfaction”.[1][2] It is also an ethical concept in Indian philosophy,[3] particularly Yoga, where it is included as one of the Niyamas by Patanjali.[4] exhale. today was a lovely day. i stayed in my body. i told myself many times over: “i love and approve of myself.” i spent time with my mother and brother and was not… Continue reading Santosha

breaking old patterns

i choose liberation, and it is simultaneously exciting and terrifying. it can be so scary to do things differently, especially when our old patterns are calcified. we feel like we will snap if we try to open up to alternative approaches. it is PAINFUL! until we heal ourselves, whether we are aware of it or… Continue reading breaking old patterns


i have been so externally focused for most of my life … i thought it was my job to regulate my parents’ wildly fluctuating emotions and moods as a child. when i (inevitably) failed to stop their dysfunction, i blamed myself. this hypervigilance and self-blaming and shaming became ingrained and followed me into adulthood. yesterday… Continue reading rejection

embodied healing

Somatic therapy is so interesting. Yesterday i had a very specific experience of it working and helping. I described the experience to my therapist and said, “This is the way.” She smiled knowingly and pointed out that I was quoting “The Mandalorian,” a show I love. 🙂  My anxiety is very strong first thing in… Continue reading embodied healing

COVID and the Four Fs of Post-Traumatic Experience

As we continue to process the time of upheaval we’ve experienced during a pandemic, this is an important time to learn about trauma and the responses… COVID and the Four Fs of Post-Traumatic Experience Great infographic about trauma responses


i started with a new therapist yesterday who specializes in somatic therapy and polyvagal theory. what i have been zeroing in on is my fawn response. i can physically pinpoint the moments when my nervous system floods with adrenaline. when it’s happening, i can basically picture what’s happening inside my body. these moments can be… Continue reading fawn

4 keys to enjoying life and being happy

Be happy for others Have compassion for those who are struggling Celebrate those who do what we do and do it better Disregard the wicked According to Patanjali and the ancient wisdom of yoga as shared by my teacher today! i received a beautiful compliment from two fellow yogis today … they thanked me for… Continue reading 4 keys to enjoying life and being happy